MY LIFE AFTER LOCKDOWN....!!!

Hello Sunshines,

It's time to rise and shine although we have nothing to do much sitting at home, thinking about how to pass time and what to do after this lockdown... Our no so perfect life finally teach us the usual normal busy life was so perfect and so beautiful. 

Sitting at home doing nothing makes me realize I should pen down my thoughts that I am having during this lockdown... but then all those judgments make me worried that world will think about me after reading it... but at this point, life is so uncertain if I don't confess now who knows I will never get another chance to speak...

Just one month back "QUARANTINE", "ISOLATION", "LOCKDOWN" these words were unknown to us and now even a kid can explain what it means...

Now that I have enough time I sit mainly with my phone to check news and all of a sudden I saw a video of WORLD TRADE CENTRE blasts where some last minutes conversation was captured... there was few audio clips of the pilot where he was saying goodbye to his family and hoping to see them again...then there was an audio of a female passenger who was calling her husband saying she loves him and their kids so much and she is scared... then there are few more audio of many people whose last few words, the helplessness in their voice and the last moment cry crashing so many thoughts altogether in my brain that it brings tears to my eyes and the output came as " I DON'T WANT TO DIE LIKE THIS"... all my life I have been a good girl to my parents trying to fulfill whatever they wanted...then a wife who supports her husband in his ups and downs no matter what she feels as she supposed to be there...and then being a responsible mother to my kid whose world roam around me. I tried to be a responsible parent as much as I can and so I took all his fault on my shoulders which is an ideal example of a parent according to our society but what about me? myself? I tried to find out at what part in my life I am just me, thinking about me, happy for me?... I found none...everything is relative ...my husband's success is mine happiness and my kid's progress is my achievement. There is not a single moment that defines me...

We never thought 2020 will teach us so many things at one go... I use to make so many resolutions on every new year but never intend to fulfill them but this time the situation teach me to take my vows seriously... 

Things I learned:-

• I can survive without youtube videos.
• Writing blogs is one of my best way to share my thoughts through it.
• I can survive on a diet.
• I can't live peacefully doing anything for me, I had to be serious about ME.
• I can't take responsibility for everyone's happiness, I should focus on me...
• Being selfish is bad and thinking about only yourself is not right but being happy is our birthright and we should focus on that only...
• People(your loved ones) survive no matter whether you are with them or without them...
• Life goes on with or without you so in the end, you should be your priority...

My vows:-
 

• Once this over I will think about me from now on... I will keep myself on top priority. I should be my reason for my happiness, my success, and my achievement...
• I will take care of myself, I will take the risk in my life with my uncertain decisions so that I don't regret when I die...
• I will teach my kid to grow his world and I will teach him to survive without me (you never know life is so uncertain).
• Once this our not so perfect life is over I will rethink my life again and I will give it another chance to be a cause of my smile...

This penning down my thoughts brings so much calmness in my thoughts that finally I can breathe. I know many of you will judge me but the truth is this is ME... the true me and my true thoughts...you can either accept it or you can easily skip my chapter... but you can't deny your thoughts of BEING YOU.

That's all for today, I will try to pen down as much as possible from now on...
XOXO
SAMMY :*